Ohh Money Money Money (Mozambique, Maputo)

 When I first heard that song a few years back, I was still suffering from a mental block with regards to money. I had my own ideas about how money is not important and believed that love is the only force that rules the world and makes it rotate on its axis…GLAD I WOKE UP FROM THAT DREAM to join the real world! Madness.

OHH MONEY YOU MY HONEY / My bitch is my money / OHH MONEY YOU MY HONEY / Money is my bitch / OHH MONEY MONEY MONEY / That’s because you keep a nigger rich / OHH MONEY MONEY MONEY /  Girl I think you got me pussy whipped… Nas in the album ‘I am’ – Money is my B…]

Fact is everything in life that one wants to achieve requires a fair amount of money. Money is the one thing that can surpass racial discrimination, (well at least to ones face, I think even God has given up on this one!). Money is your VISA to a world where you are allowed to get away with the most shocking of behavior and the world turns the other cheek. (I’m not saying that’s a good thing. The way the world is today, money is the root of all things life-like. Money is a very necessary evil.


Only 5 hours away by road, Mozambique really is small heaven. Maybe my experience of it was not a true reflection of what it’s really like for the ordinary man on the street…THEN IT HIT ME, LIGHT BULB MOMENT, more like a FLOOD LIGHT MOMENT, NOTHING is great for the ‘ordinary man on the street’. The ordinary man on the street has an ordinary perspective on everything and everywhere because they have an ordinary experience of everything.

People with money, have a FABULOUS perspective on life as a whole. Even in the dodgiest of circumstances, they have the VIP experience of the dodgy situation. For the majority of people, this remains a distant dream. So the lesson of the year my brothers and sisters, is to work towards not to fall under the  


I am there now, and it just does not quite work for the most part. It’s not practical to be broke. JAY Z said it, “ being broke is childish and I’m quite grown” – Feeling him? So in December of 06, before anybody realized that it’s December, my girlfriends and I hit Maputo in true rock star fashion for a weekend fit for…mmm, let’s see…ROCK STARS!

We drove to Maputo to meet up with 24 other members of our entourage for what would retrospectively be the launch of the theme I have chosen for my life this year “ THE SWEET LIFE”. The road to Maputo was an absolute pleasure, we sang and laughed and blazed  & it was the ish… We stopped over in Nelspruit to visit a friend who took us for a downtown-shopping spree, lots of fun in the blazing sun! We arrived in Maputo just before early evening and the place was buzzing with life. Maputo is a very sexy place, even though it’s not aesthetically appealing; it is divine in its persistence to remain alive.

The people are full of life, the women are beautiful, the women are beautiful, and the women are beautiful sorry did I neglect to mention that the women are beautiful? So we set off…


Day One: Arrive @ hotel Pestana Remova Maputo, unpack, unwind, fix a drink in your room, chill & take it all in. The view is too much!

7 pm – A table for 30 by the ocean to wine and dine and meet the entourage.

10 pm – Back to the HOTEL for a shower and change to hit the club.

00h00 – Meet at the hotel lobby to convoy to club Mambos

1h00 – Dance your heart out

2h00 – Your heart out

3h00 – Your heart is danced out

4h00 – Dance out your heart as the sun rises and the music gets better! HAVE YOU EVER!

5h00 – Reach for your sunglasses, the day after has become one with the day before and you are dancing your heart out

6h00 – It can’t still possibly be this good at the club at this time!

7h00 – It is!

8h00 – I think it’s time to leave now; we have a boat to catch.

± 8h20 – We peel ourselves out of the club…


9h00 – Back to the hotel, not bother to sleep, shower, change, off to breakfast to nurse the should be hang-over but it’s not because you never slept so its something in between being drunk and hung-over.


11h00 – Leave for the water with two fully kitted DJ’s, cooler boxes packed with all the right grown-up juice & our sunscreen in tow.

12h00 – Who is looking at the time?


We dance, we drink, some sleep, we laze around in the sun – LIFE IS TRULY BEAUTIFUL, All we see is blue, I need no other color.

After around 2 and a half hours, we closely approach Portuguese Island, we are all on the deck, dancing to John Legend, nothing could be sweeter?

Could that be a fully decked out table for 30 on the Island with a chef? Just for us?

Yes, mam, I am not mistaken. It is true. A seafood buffet awaits.

We feast. We swim. We feast some more, we sip Veuve Clicquot & Moet Chandon, I hate Moet, I think it tastes like kak, but that’s not the point, the point is, those who love it, had it and could have it in abundance.

Our DJ’s get to work and we get to stepping and bobbing in the water, have you ever done the bus stop in the ocean?


Sunset ushers us back onto our boat. We have eaten more prawns than we have ever eaten in one sitting. We head back to the city, watching the sunset over the sea, PRICELESS.

The beauty, the music never stops, the color blue turns to black in the night and the sound of the ocean waves grow louder than ever before, letting you know that you are truly living life as opposed to just ‘getting by. The message is a very important one; aim to live life and not just get by.

Day 3:

We all meet at 2 pm to have one last lunch overlooking the ocean. We are thanked for our participation in the weekend with message vouchers, fragrances, and other sweet gifts just for just, alas, le sweet life… We Leave Maputo satisfied and smiling with the knowledge and understanding that now we must go back to JOZI and make this happen for ourselves, in our day-to-day living.

And after all, is said and done, this is a day in the life of many people roaming this earth, me I want to be PART OF THOSE PEOPLE…

Writer:  Maishi Teffo