We sit silently. My friend stares deeply into her empty glass, occasionally shuffling the ice around with her straw. “Wow,” she says. I sit and wait for her to say something else. What started out as a festive night somehow became a long, deep discussion about love, what it consists of, and how rare it...
Category: Relationships
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Love In This Taxi …
It was bound to happen. Considering that I spend almost a quarter of my life in taxis. I am constantly, directly or indirectly, in the company of taxi drivers of every shade, size and temperament. I have spent so many hours waiting for the taxi to get full that I now consider Joburg’s taxi ranks...
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The Three Loves Theory …
My favourite model for relationships comes from the work of anthropologist Helen Fisher. She’s dedicated decades of her life and her career to studying and understanding love, intimacy and relationships. This post will cover her Three Loves Theory, a theory that I find incredibly helpful for understanding relationships. The premise of the Three Loves Theory...
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That Love That Would Never End …
Sizwe. I was thinking of my to-do list, I think. Or was it that proposal I kept putting off. I was thinking about food, just before I thought about how big my butt looked in these jeans. I think. I was thinking about anything other than you. But like you always do, uninvited, unwanted, painfully,...
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This Is How You Are Destroying Your Relationship (Part 2)
The first time that I heard someone say, “your current situation is a result of your decisions”, I was disgusted, to say the least. I imagined how a woman with three kids couldn’t escape the clutches of an abusive man. I thought of an array of reasons why she could be trapped by a tyrant....
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Rebuilding The Black Male Child – Entitlement (Part 3)
Entitlement The idea of entitlement is sometimes confused with some sense of ownership. This is partly true. Ownership is a very simple concept; a state of being an owner. Also, ownership of material objects or entities is very simple to understand. But, entitlement in our society takes a different form when it comes to men...
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You Probably Love A Man That Hates You, Worst Of All Is That You Both Don’t Know. (Part 2)
You Probably Love A Man That Hates You, Worst Of All Is That You Both Don’t Know. In the previous article I put in front you an opportunity to see hate in a different light. A kind of hate we are not accustomed to yet very familiar with it, we live and experience it daily...
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You Probably Love A Man That Hates You, Worst Of All Is You Both Don’t Know. (Part 1)
It is possible and it may be happening right now in your relationship even if you were woken up this morning by a text from him. He may have even gone on one knee a few months ago, and you agreed. Maybe when you take a look at the mirror you can hardly recognize yourself. ...
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It Takes Two To Tango …
It takes two to tango But: why Sis? It is unfair to slut-shame the other woman. It is wrong to single out the other woman, to put all the cheating blame on her But: why Sis? It is in fact the man who is the cheat; it is he who has been unfaithful; it is he who...
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A Little Dead; A Little Scared; A Little Brave …
Sipho and I were in an accident, the other night. I made it, somehow, but Sipho wasn’t so lucky. Sipho is no more.And people have questions. My friends, my acquaintances, the people who stopped to help, the police, the paramedics, the doctor, the nurse, myself…people have questions. They have well-meaning but annoying; well-meaning but tedious; well-meaning...