I have never been good at relationships. Particularly, I have never been good at romantic relationships. Something about them seems to me unnatural. Actually, a lot seems unnatural. There is the rushed togetherness. There is the relentlessly pursued sense of oneness. There is the expected sharing of the self, the packing into little conversations of...
Tag: single
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Indoda Yesimanje Manje (Modern Man)
When the resident office trickster, George, asked me to write on the modern man, I was very reluctant. In fact, I turned the piece in at the last minute because the word “modern” is devoid of meaning to me. Instead, I started thinking about manhood itself, and my very identity as a human being, as...
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How I Came To Understand My Male Privilege By Experiencing Racism …
A few months ago, I was watching a documentary about the history of the formation of our country with my son . It touched on topics such as slavery, colonisation and apartheid. While we were watching he turned to me and asked, ‘Papa, why did white people do this to us?’ It is not that...
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Ten Commandments for the Modern Man ….
Well, you see I have a lot of male friends. In fact, I can count the number of female friends I have on one hand. I’ve always been drawn to men. Even when I get to a mixed group of people, I always find myself gravitating towards the men. I find women strange and rather...
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Happiness Is A Four Letter Word: The Men
The movie “Happiness Is A Four-Letter Word” opened a few weeks ago with record breaking stats in just 10 days. By all intents and purposes, the film – a screen adaptation of the book by the same name, written by Cynthia Jele – is a chick flick; the three leads are all women, namely, Nandi...
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Marvin’s Room at Churchills
Marvin welcomes you to your celebration, as a man. It is not easy being a man. It is not easy to have to know, to have to navigate, to have to juggle, to have to nurture, to have to build, to have to acquire; to have to achieve, to have to excel. But you are...
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The Speech That Won’t Go Away …
Address by Stellenbosch University Alumnus demands deep reflection – and action. As the student movement readies itself for the challenges of 2016, an address by Stellenbosch University alumnus, Lovelyn Nwadeyi at its Convocation last month, has laid down serious challenges for the university leadership and for higher education more generally. The speech by Lovelyn Nwadeyi,...
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Bentley Mulsanne: Updated Swagger and Power …
Aimed at greeting the public for the first time at the Geneva Autoshow is Bentley’s updated version of its Mulsanne flagship sedan. The introduction of this car will see the nameplate separated into three distinct models for the first time which include the regular Mulsanne, high-performance Mulsanne Speed and the chauffer-driven Mulsanne which boasts a...
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Love In This Taxi …
It was bound to happen. Considering that I spend almost a quarter of my life in taxis. I am constantly, directly or indirectly, in the company of taxi drivers of every shade, size and temperament. I have spent so many hours waiting for the taxi to get full that I now consider Joburg’s taxi ranks...
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The Three Loves Theory …
My favourite model for relationships comes from the work of anthropologist Helen Fisher. She’s dedicated decades of her life and her career to studying and understanding love, intimacy and relationships. This post will cover her Three Loves Theory, a theory that I find incredibly helpful for understanding relationships. The premise of the Three Loves Theory...