Decoding Women: 5 Things For Less Stress And More Good Sex

I have finally settled on 5 things to focus on for my session at the Loving Women, Understanding Men: Better breakfast seminar, this Saturday the 27th.

You see, one of the things I have learned about men is that they are generally overwhelmed by women’s capacity to talk, seemingly about a million things at one go, so to put the men at ease I am committing to 5 things. I promise to stick to these 5 things to help men decode women for less stress, misunderstanding, breakdowns, and break ups – and of course more happiness all round.

Last night my fellow speakers – Anne-Marie Clulow-Visser and George Matsheke – and I were on Mapaseka Mokwele’s show on Kaya FM sharing a preview of the seminar’s content. Listen to get a sense of what you can expect on Saturday.

So what 5 things did I pick for maximum reduction of stress and maximum increase of joy and fulfilment in romantic relationships?

  1. Focused vs. Diffused awareness. Men tend towards a focused awareness and women tend towards a diffused awareness. IMPLICATION: Women often cannot give men the undivided attention that men desire from their partners. This may leave a man feeling like he is not valued or not a priority. Guys, it’s not that she doesn’t want to focus on you – she just finds it extremely challenging to do so, yes even in bed. The good news is that I will tell you how to help her give you all the attention you want. In fact every piece of information I give will be accompanied by practical advice on how to make it work for you.
  2. Feeling Safe. Men are generally stronger and usually bigger than women, and therefore don’t quite get that safety is front and centre in women’s minds pretty much ALL the time. Therefore our sense of safety or lack thereof affects EVERYTHING else.
  3. Talking. Men and women talk in different ways, for different reasons and resulting in different effects. For example women talk, for the sake of talking and it actually makes us feel better, especially when we are talking about our problems. When we talk about our problems we release Serotonin and our stress levels go down. Talking about a problem without seeking a solution is ABSOLUTE TORTURE for a man!!! So what do you guys do? You rush us, or offer a solution which is usually the worst possible response you can go for.
  4. Stress. Stress affects men and women differently and we respond differently to it. Naturally when  a loved one is stressed you want to help, but here’s the thing; the things that relieve stress for the one gender often exacerbate it for the other. For example, see point 3 above. So your attempts to help from your point of view often you often make things worse.
  5. My super favourite sexual polarity chart. The actions that make her not want to shag you anymore even as she continues to love you to bits!

You will hear from the podcast that we are passionate about these topics. The seminar will 10 x more informative and loads of fun.

If you haven’t gotten your tickets, purchase them here.