Men Mature Too Fast.

Men mature too fast. You tell a man a problem, he skips the emotional turbulence and quickly flips to solution mode in the calmest manner to the point where he comes across as lacking emotion. That time you wanna vent and indulge in the pity, caress the negativity of the situation. You hear dudes say “go a tshwana” nonchalantly, having processed multiple scenarios to realize that what is actually a problem is more a condition you live with thus no need to be all sulky. That is when “go a tshwana” is uttered. Men know that actively participating in the negative quality of an emotion is not a healthy thing that shows you care. It is actually very toxic and immature. Men will tell each other to fuck off then sit and have a beer within minutes, then laugh it off.

Having observed many in our earth partners, men then come up with descriptive aggregates like “don’t be a girl about it”, to call you out for being too emotional over matter. It is obviously said in a demeaning manner. It is obviously wrong. But it’s not wrong you right wrongly. To right a wrong wrongly in this case is to encourage men to be emotional about things we shouldn’t be emotional about. If you have the capacity to not be consumed by emotion, why close the power plants that give you such capacity? Hello Eskom. And when you know you and your penis are not ready to settle down, why allow society to psychosocially manipulate you into a concomitant commitment with phrases like “you don’t wanna grow up that’s why you not ready to settle down”?

The man knows he’s not ready. He also knows the reasons are not for public consumption. It’s between him, his pockets, his penis, his plans, his god, his morals, and whatever else is there in his unperson radius. Most importantly, it’s the maturity that renders the absence of readiness a more refined picture…an internal picture…a PERSONAL one. That maturity gatekeeps societal pressures that measure him. That’s why he will be 40 with a 20-year-old without a hint of emotional Epsom salt.

Our earth partners judge each other for sending their genitals on adventures. They also turn around and preempt “don’t judge me” please were you to give them the eye over it all. Men accept the props and wear em like badges.

Writer @mithisa_motho