It is often said that a good relationship is one where people want the same things, having more in common than opposite. Yet, there are fiery relationships that have managed to go one for years and decades with people involved seemingly totally opposites of a coin, but a coin nonetheless. We then say opposites attract to explain this phenomenon . Then there are those where the couple seemingly love each other more when they are destroying each other, well, to the observer that is. You can observe two people ever sliding deeper into alcoholism or drugs and their love for each other growing stronger the more deteriorating their health becomes. They understand it, they continue it and they both need it, each other, so it seems. So in this case no one can really point out a particular relationship to say that kind of relationship is the best kind of relationship. However, they can say that a particular person is perfect for them because the said person gives them what they want. They are something they have always wanted; they have found what the always wanted…
A Wedding
…As we grow older, men and women are ever panicking over the seemingly lack of finding lovers of their own. Pressure from family, culture and friends has spawned a new kind of person. A person that does not want a marriage but desperately wants a wedding. Imagine the thought of people having sang for you, without a miss “Happy birthday” for 35 years and guaranteed they will sing “Amagugu” when you pass on but chances are they will never sing “Tswang Tswang Tswang”? Yes! It’s a frightening gaping void in an otherwise steady life. So maybe to your lover you are a nothing a weapon to fight against their demons and family;’s demons. Here you are thinking you are beginning a new life only to find that to your lover you were just a tick off a bucket list, cultural obligation, a response to a panic button. A tick that will show their circle of friends that they can also get married like other children get 5th birthdays and other not. It’s all…
A Ticket To Fame
…about what the other person wants and what they are willing to do and who to use to get it. You are probably someone’s ticket to fame where you dating someone will open up a whole world of contacts which they could use to advance their own careers through name dropping your name. Thinking about this you would probably think that it only happens between a non-entity and famous person. But notice how a newly famous person always has some sort of history being revealed that they dated an already famous person way before they became famous? Someone climbing you might be in actual fact be climbing you ladder to their own destination. This has been going on for years and it is as normal as dating people because they fit the perfect profile…
A Donor
…of being a parent. Like a wedding some people are coming to realise that time to have kids his running out. All that money, qualifications and brands are not humans. It’s easy to forget the preciousness in creating human life having being preoccupied with worldly ambitions so much so you forgot to live forever. When you die without children you live nothing of you going forward, a bloodline stops. A family story stops, you parents love story ends with your silence. Your stacked up brands and qualifications will not tell the story of your existence or your family’s existence. We sometimes look at the poor with dismay feeling like they are stupid for having too many children while the rich have one or two or none. There is a certain joy and fulfilment that comes with having children. Luckily this joy can be afforded by almost everyone with or without money. It’s almost like a second chance at a difficult life. And who is to say what real joy is? You could be happy right now in love with someone who is currently starting up an entirely new family out there without your knowledge. That does not diminish the fact that you are happy right now and planning a future with them as you read. Find out exactly what you are to your lover before it’s too late.
Writer: Banele Rewo Photographer: Leeroy Jason