Do Not Disturb

by Marvin Writer

posted in

A lot of lying happened in December, those scenarios and flings expired on the 1st. That being said, why is it that men seem to enjoy disturbing the peace of women.

Here is a single woman, happy. She’s upwardly mobile, she has her life relatively together. Financially stable, she’s intelligent and well groomed too, in simple terms she’s a catch. Along comes a male homosapien who just wants to bother her and disturb her peace.

They meet (under various circumstances) and essentially hit it off. Numbers are exchanged and in no time the banter begins. He’s calling and texting, asking her on dates – he’s pursuing her and she’s reciprocating. In no time, her day starts and ends with messages from him. They start hanging out and seeing each other frequently – go monate… or so she thought.

Then the communication becomes less frequent, “good morning/good night” is no more. She sits there and starts wondering if it all happened? Was it a figment of her imagination that there was a man actively pursuing her? The questions just don’t end, she wondered endlessly and questions her self as to what she did wrong?

Now, this is no made up story – this is reality. It has happened to many women, myself included and to this very day I cannot come up with a remotely logical reason as to why this happens? Why do the sons of other women enjoy disturbing our peace? Did they get bored? Was it just the whole “men are hunters” mentality and getting a particular woman satisfies the desire to conquer? Is it just a sick game men enjoy playing with unassuming women? I’d like to believe that one wouldn’t go through so much effort to just hit it, sex is so easily available hle – why so many lies? The truth is we just don’t know why guys do it.

Seeing as it’s a new year, we humbly request that our peace is not disturbed. Let’s just have honest conversations where intentions are made clear from the beginning, don’t make women believe something different based on actions. If you want to just sleep with her, make it clear – be man enough to let her know and allow her the ability to make a conscious decision in terms of being with you.

If you want to play games, rather move on and do not disturb us and waste our time. We could be entertaining your games and ignoring people who are more serious.

Writer: Palesa Motau

  • Palama

    They would rather be blown by Kim’s Nuclear missiles than be honest from the word go.

    I see this happening often even within my own circle.

    Sometimes men like the idea of you but being with you is another story of its own.
    I am glad women are finally no longer tolerating such behavior,being after men who play hot and cold. Be in or fokof.

    It would be interesting to hear men give their honest piece on this article.

    Happy New Year.

    • George Matsheke

      The truth will not get you laid until you get to your 30’s – guys lie because it works, yes its tricky the older you get but lies work. There is a thrill with regards to convincing someone to date you because you were not part of their plans and now you, the tricky part is when we get you, we dont know what to do with you

      • TheLooz

        Then, do not disturb our peace! Remove that thrill playng Playstation or something.

        • George Matsheke

          but thats not the same, but i hear you …

      • Cynthia Giyani

        This part here – “There is a thrill with regards to convincing someone to date you because you were not part of their plans and now you, the tricky part is when we get you, we dont know what to do with you” – is some deep stuff.

  • Sivu


    I was sitting at Newscafe after work some weeks ago, and I started jotting things down. Apparently it’s weird to walk in and read a book in such places, so we write. And I had these same questions. Why do these people bother us this way? The lies. The promises.

    And of course, the immediate correction when you ask, “Are we just shagging?”

    “Babe, how can you ask that? Do you not feel me making love to you there? (pointing to bed) Does that feel like JUST shagging to you?”

    Aaaah!! May the universe deal with these brothers accordingly. Also, may we, as the women, be enlightened as to what our roles are in these end results…

    • George Matsheke

      Newscafe is a weird place to do such though. At times even when want just a shag its a thrill for a girl to get you into a relationship because she believes that she exception to the rule

      • Sivu

        Oh no, I don’t really expect anything from someone I meet at Newscafe. The Newscafe reference was just that, a reference. I was at Newscafe when I wrote something, asking similar questions to the one posed by the writer of this piece.

        • TheLooz

          but why do expect less from someone based on whereyou meet them? a mate gave me a tongue lashing for expecting to meet someone decent at a club, my question remains – if we (that consisder ourselves catches) go to certain places, why then do we expect to not find our matches there?

          • Sivu

            It’s society really. They have brainwashed me into thinking that I need to meet someone somewhere decent- also read as “church”. My issue is that the church brothers are not necessarily above board by virtue of being Amadodana, and the counter argument is that when you meet someone “ebumnandini” that’s all they’re good for!

            To be honest, I just want a man who will fall from the sky like the manna in Moses’ time!

          • George Matsheke

            All I am saying is that Newscafe is the HQ of Married men who are looking for some fun, thats all i am saying. Not to say you wont find them anywhere else but chances are you will find them at Newscafe

          • TheLooz

            Hahahahahha he will come to you
            P.S. chances are you have already met your future husband/life partner – they are most likely friends or acquaitances with one of your friends or acquaintances…

  • Thaps Matsabu

    Unfortunately I am not such a man…but I have seen them all around me and continue to see them even today…it would be nice to hear from such a man…I once stayed with this guy, he will go to a club from Thursday till Sunday…and everyday, he will bring a different gal…my girlfriend then and my wife now, used to think, that what we do when she is not there…eventually, I moved into my own place…

    • George Matsheke

      I had a house mate like that at some point, I had a girlfriend at the time – its hard for her to believe you when she sees what the other does because of same whatsapp group things