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My Boyfriend Has A Girlfriend …

They are happy
He makes her sandwiches
She gets to smell his crisp scent, of nourishing nothingness
He gives her neck-kisses in the morning, tells her she is loved, he loves her and wishes her a great day
She gets to take him in

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Dear Black Men …

Dear Black Men: We love you; we need you. We know that it’s not easy to be a man. It’s not easy to be a woman, either; to be educated, career focussed, wanting to grow in love; be the other half that supports a family, supports a home. But we don’t know what it’s like...

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Baby Daddy Part 5 (Finale)

“…sometimes to go as you expected with a pregnancy and then you have to seriously consider termination”, these are the gynecologists words after a routine scan when my girlfriend was about 6 months pregnant. What? Huh? Please note that this dude just said this out of the blue. “Terminate? Why would we do that?” I...

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Baby Daddy (Part 4)

It is the fourth of February 2008. A month and a half has passed since my girlfriend and I told our families that are going to be parents. She is about 3 months pregnant. It’s 2:30am on a Monday morning and my phone rings, it’s my brother. “It’s bad news”, he says. With those three...

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Baby Daddy (Part 3)

“LENGANE IYADELELA!  How dare he come into our family without any elders from his house? Who does he think he is? Looking someone’s mother in the eye and telling that rubbish!” My girlfriend’s grandmother was breathing fire and brimstone. Yes fam, the wheels of my flaming ‘I want to do right’ chariot had come off...

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Baby Daddy (Part 2)

I don’t know what it would take for you to hear the heartbeat of your own child and then decide to do an abortion. Whatever it takes, I didn’t have it. My girlfriend had already decided she was keeping the baby. I was late in my decision. On hearing the heartbeat my I nearly fell...

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Baby Daddy (Part 1)

A loose definition of the modern man is a hustler, dreamer, hard worker and this is besides his other, more formal job titles. But there is one job title that puts fear into many modern man, and that is “fatherhood”. Let’s break bread and let me tell you MY story. What does two lines mean?...

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Why I Love Black Men …

There’s always reason for us black women to complain about that ‘no good, lazy ass black man’. He’s always portrayed as a philandering, beer-guzzling specimen whose only worthwhile contribution has been sustaining an ancient myth about his ‘to-be-feared-by-god’ loins, which make him desirable to even the most chaste of virgins. Well, I want to be...